CHAPTER 40: WHEW, WHAT A YEAR!
This past Monday was my birthday so yes I'm a Virgo baby. It was my 40th and whew, it feels crazy to even just say that out loud. Chapter 40 of my life, dreams, goals, experiences, wins and losses. What a roller coaster of emotions I've been on since this year started that it almost seems as if I'm watching someone else's life play out on a huge screen but I've been brought along for the ride.
What have I learned? Plenty. What have I lost? More than plenty. Were there times I wanted to give up and throw in the towel? Absolutely, and I still often do feel that way from time to time. There were a few times this year I forgot to be grateful and whined about things not going my way but then my support system aka my S.T.A.T Squad (if you read my love letters to my sister circle back in February, you'd understand) was there to remind me that I had come a long way, how great I was doing and to keep going because now was not the time to give up. So I did, I kept going. Then should I not have some major accomplishment milestone to report? Should there not be a victory of epic proportions that I should have recorded? There are:-
1. I'm Healthy - without sounding cliche, I can't stress enough how grateful I am for this alone. CoVid19 has been ravaging our world with such savagery but I have and remain unscathed.
2. I'm Alive - Ya'll remember how the year started with the loss of Kobe and Gianna Bryant? Then just recently, the King of Wakanda lost his battle with colon cancer at just a couple of years older than me? The utter shock of Chadwick Boseman's death still stings and sadly reminds of how short life really is/can be. I don't take my 'breaths' for granted because many have 'breathed' their last this year alone.
3. I'm Creative - I may not be a Michaelangelo or Picasso, a Beyonce or Gigi Hadid but my little blog and small community of readers fills me with a sense of pride that money and recognition could never give me. I'm not a tortured artist but I understand how debilitating to the gift that this could actually be.
4. I'm Free - Even though many a time that freedom feels like it has come under threat from external forces. I'm still yet free. Physically, mentally and emotionally liberated from the kind of struggle and suffering that breaks - that kind of pain that brings grown men to their knees, I do not know it and God makes sure that I never will.